“We must be careful that when tension occurs it does not become a friction. We take the issues that may potentially divide us and put them on one side. This is a time to renew our friendships, allowing the Holy Spirit to ease the friction. Yet we must remember that we cannot hold onto something in the Spirit without tension being present.” (Graham Cooke, Prophecy and Responsibility)
In our key relationships, our Heavenly Father, in His wisdom, ordains a good and necessary tension.
What do we need to do when there’s tension in our relationships?
1.) Seek fresh vision. In tears and discouraged in my marriage, business, and other relationships, I met with a pastor recently. He prayed for a moment, asking God for insight. Immediately he described an image he saw of an trained, equipped paratrooper wearing night gear, parachuting into enemy territory.
Aha! I thought. My apparent invisibility in this situation is an intentional cloaking so I can sneak up on the enemy in stealth mode.
Ask friends for an image of you amidst the tension.
2.) Ask God to define your needs. Are you putting expectations on others for needs that only God can meet? I did. In my conversations with friends, I found myself expecting from them what only God can do: to consistently listen, provide focus and be the source of constant wisdom.
I asked the Lord, “How can I hear You more clearly?”
“Spend a day alone with me each month.”
“Okay, I’m in.”
Is God encouraging you to take more prime time to meet with Him so he can love on you and encourage you?
3.) Ask the Lord, “What shift is occurring here?” Assume “tension doesn’t necessarily mean something is wrong. It means that something is happening” (Graham Cooke). Like a guitar player running his fingers up and down the neck of a guitar, you’re changing notes (and maybe making it up as you go along). So what if it doesn’t come together like magic? God’s in it and loves the changes you’re making.
4.) Seek and expect to find the opposite of what the enemy says to you. In the darkroom of your soul, the devil brandishes photo negatives and calls them done. But when God develops them, what’s black will become white. What’s yellow will be purple. What’s red will turn out green. It’s a simple scheme of deceit: playing opposites.
When you hear the devil say, “This fear will destroy you,” know that a calm peace is on its way. When he says, “You’re controlling,” I guarantee you’re on the verge of an absolute explosion of freedom in Christ.
(To be continued.)
Are you in conflict with others? I totally hope so. How’s our heavenly Father using a good and necessary tension in it?